the cellist of sarajevo reflection
Dear diary,
Today was another terrible day. All around me is chaos. The war doesn’t seem to be progressing. It is only getting worse. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can take this. I can’t stand any more of my loved ones being dragged away from me. Everyday I think of my mother being shot holding my newborn sister in her arms. One bullet took two lives. Not a day goes by without being overwhelmed with sadness from that day. The worst part is I witnessed the whole thing and there was not one thing I could do. Today on my way to the bakery, a rifle went off and for a split second I thought Ms.Terzić, the old lady who used to run the flower shop near my apartment, had been shot but luckily she was able to run to the other side of the intersection. Either they’re lucky or the sniper made a mistake. I cant imagine her being gone as well. How dear she was, always giving me an extra daisy to give to the little orphan girl who sat in the park all alone every Thursday afternoon. But right after this alarming event, I couldn’t help but think of my mother. I had to refrain myself from screaming so instead I collapsed to the ground into a ball of terror. If I were to scream I could have easily been the next victim to fall to his/her death.
Every second of the day, I am scared. I am scared to get shot walking down the street to get water; I am scared to stay inside my apartment because it might get bombed or set on fire and I would have no way of escaping; I am scared the food supply will get cut off and I will die of starvation. Nothing brings me happiness in life anymore. I am always worried. There is more negative than positive in my life and I don’t know how much longer I can take of this. There is no one left I love or care about. I am all alone in this dark and scary world. I pray every night that this will be over soon and that I will wake up from this nightmare. Too many people are dying. Too much blood is overflowing the streets. This needs to end.
Today was another terrible day. All around me is chaos. The war doesn’t seem to be progressing. It is only getting worse. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can take this. I can’t stand any more of my loved ones being dragged away from me. Everyday I think of my mother being shot holding my newborn sister in her arms. One bullet took two lives. Not a day goes by without being overwhelmed with sadness from that day. The worst part is I witnessed the whole thing and there was not one thing I could do. Today on my way to the bakery, a rifle went off and for a split second I thought Ms.Terzić, the old lady who used to run the flower shop near my apartment, had been shot but luckily she was able to run to the other side of the intersection. Either they’re lucky or the sniper made a mistake. I cant imagine her being gone as well. How dear she was, always giving me an extra daisy to give to the little orphan girl who sat in the park all alone every Thursday afternoon. But right after this alarming event, I couldn’t help but think of my mother. I had to refrain myself from screaming so instead I collapsed to the ground into a ball of terror. If I were to scream I could have easily been the next victim to fall to his/her death.
Every second of the day, I am scared. I am scared to get shot walking down the street to get water; I am scared to stay inside my apartment because it might get bombed or set on fire and I would have no way of escaping; I am scared the food supply will get cut off and I will die of starvation. Nothing brings me happiness in life anymore. I am always worried. There is more negative than positive in my life and I don’t know how much longer I can take of this. There is no one left I love or care about. I am all alone in this dark and scary world. I pray every night that this will be over soon and that I will wake up from this nightmare. Too many people are dying. Too much blood is overflowing the streets. This needs to end.