Women talk in order to stablish a relationship while men are more likely to do something to demonstrate their commitment. Women see communication as key. Therefore, they expect their husbands to be a better version of their best friends. Men tend to get distracted easily; whenever a man wants to listen to someone,…
Based off of the knowledge I have gained while participating in Interpersonal Communications course, I have a few key points for communication that will help strengthen and develop your new and blooming relationship. One of the keys to a happy and successful marriage is in fact communication. Do not let the act of talking blind you from the roots of true communication. There is a definite difference between speaking to one another, and communicating with one another, and that line is drawn between quantity of communication and quality of communication.…
There is a large problem when it comes to communication between men and women, whether it is between children, teenagers, or adults; because of a cross gender society. Once both sides understand this "cross-culture communication" problem, so that no gender is blamed, improvement will naturally occur. Deborah Tannen, is an award winning writer and a best selling author for her eccentric essays based on differences of male and female conversations. In the essay, "Sex, Lies and Conversation" she writes on the many distinctions of the style of conversations on both men and women.…
You would like to think that a two year relationship would be standing strong on two pillars. But what if a third pillar tried to knock down one of the stable pillars? If the third pillar succeeded, then what would you think? Who is at fault for the failed relationship? Dr. Laura Schlessinger, author of “The Improper Care and Feeding of Husbands,” explained how women are, ultimately, the reason their relationships are not successful. However, in the essay, “Sex, Lies and Conversation,” Deborah Tannen offers proof that both genders are to blame for the failed relationship. Essentially, relationships are difficult to maintain because men and women are wired differently.…
In Debrah Tannen’s essay on “Why Is It So Hard For Men and Women to Talk to Each Other,” she tries to inform us of this lack of communication between men and women and the problems that it can cause. The author starts off by giving the reader an example of a situation involving a man and his wife where the husband would comment on how much his wife is the talker in the family and how she is always talking when she is at home. This demonstrates that men generally talk more in public situations, while women tend to talk more at home. She follows up by talking about how most of the women that divorced gave lack of…
You may find it easier to have a conversation with a stranger than with your spouse. Don’t be alarmed when this happens. It can happen to the best relationships. Communication is not just exchanging words with one another. It’s much more than that. Communication is the process in which we share information, ideas, and feelings. (Sole, K.)(2011). One great article to read is Can we talk? Researchers talks about the role of communication in marriage by Schoenberg. The article states that many married couples believe they are communicating with one another, but find out it’s not enough. Tammy and Edward, it is important not only to talk about everyday things with one another, but to also share your feelings, fears, perceptions and doubts with one another. Researchers have shown that couple who already disclose these things with one another are happily married. (Schoenberg, N.)(1011). Orchich states that one way to maintain a healthy amount of communication is to set aside ten minutes a day for casual communication. (Schoenberg, N.)(2011). This can be a great way to keep the communication level alive. It is also a good way for you to share your inter most personal…
This is a prime example of miscommunication in marriage that Tannen believes is caused by how women are unaware that men often don’t have to make eye contact to hear or remember what they are being told. Therefore, just because a man does not appear to be listening does not mean that he…
According to Dr. Louann Brizandine, in a 24 hour period, the average man will speak anywhere from 7000-10,000 words, whereas a woman can speak anywhere from 20,000-24,000 words. Thousands upon thousands of words are thrown out of the human brains, but how many of those are truly understood? More importantly, how many of those are not? In Deborah Tannen 's essay, "Sex, Lies, and Conversation," pathos and logos are dropped in bombshells in order for the reader to feel accessible to such information. She poses the question, "Why is it so hard to talk to my spouse?" Through various statistics and examples, she makes the reader feel like it is his or her world she is talking about, or individualizing the audience members. The pathos in this essay mostly stirs the inner desire for a happy marriage; she simply makes the male or female reader feel like they too have misinterpreted the opposite sex. Suddenly, the reader might feel guilty, but then relieved when Tannen displays the solution. However, the statistics, quotes, and facts in the essay…
Tannen, Deborah. "Sex, Lies and Conversation; Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?." Georgetown University: Web hosting. Washington Post, n.d. Web. 17 Feb. 2012. <http://www9.georgetown.edu/faculty/tannend/sexlies.htm>…
When growing up and interacting with others, boys and girls usually play with other children who are of the same gender. Showing that the a child’s development is based upon peer interactions which link to how they talk with their significant other (208). Men and women interpret the need of conversation differently as they are growing up, typically men stay more reserved towards their friends, where women are more likely to talk more openly. When women and men grow together in order to form relationships, the women will be more expecting of the man to be open and talkative when it comes to their conversations, whether they be in public or in the privacy of their own home. This stems back to how a woman is raised. Women are raised to not be afraid to express themselves, so because of this, a wife will expect “her husband to be a new and improved version of a best friend” (208). A sense of closeness is formed within a relationships, when conversations of importance are brought up. If that bond is not formed early on, the relationship could…
After reading the article “Close Relationship Sometimes Mask Poor Communication” it made me realize that I and my wife have poor communication skills. We been together for a good two years and we still haven’t gotten the proper communication between each other. She likes to be rude and cut me off while I’m trying to prove a point because she always thinks she’s right when clearly at times she’s wrong but won’t admit it. She always wants materialistic things and don’t understand the responsibilities that I have to take care of by myself due to me being the only one working. Also she always cry or be sadden if things doesn’t go her way and every time I get off of work there is always complaints or I want this and that from her. Another problem which is probably the biggest is that my wife always put our business out on social websites but can’t even come to me and communicate with me head on about the situation. This article opens my eyes and make me realize that it’s correct in a lot of sense.…
Baugh, E.J, & Humphries, D. (2010). Can we talk? improving couples ' communication1. Unpublished manuscript, Department of Psychology, University of Florida, Gainesville, Florida. Retrieved from http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/pdffiles/fy/fy04400.pdf…
As Tannen states “For women, as for girls, intimacy is the fabric of relationships, and talk is the thread from which it is woven” is exactly how I and most women’s friendships are based off. Conversation for women is a major part of friendship. Women want to know they are able to talk to their husbands just as they would to their best friends. When I am conversing with a guy I want to know everything they are feeling about the topic at the time of the discussion. It makes you feel as though you are connected with the other when you are able to relate your feelings. When I am able to start a conversation with a man and not feel as though I can connect with them it is hard to continue a conversation. Especially when I feel like…
After reading “Can We Talk? Researcher Talks about the role of Communication in Marriages” I realized how much I can relate to it. I am a firm believer in communication and it being a key factor in any successful relationship. I feel as though I can relate to this article when discussing self-disclosure in relationships. I am a very vocal person anyway so in my relationship I am very vocal. I like to express my feelings good or bad. I open up and discuss any and everything with him. He’ll never have to guess or question my feelings for him. Once I got comfortable with him it was very easy to talk about my childhood, what I wanted for my future and anything in between.…
It is no secret that men and women have marriage problems. A big source of that happens to be communication issues. Men tend to not be interested in what the women wants to talk about. Same goes with women, they may not be as interested in male conversations or men do not give as much detail as the women would like. That is why many are attending marriage counseling.…