A Humorous Essay
Humorous Narrative Essay by *MidnightCrystalSage
As a small child, parents have always taught their little bundle of joy never to wander around in the store, to always stick by them like super glue, and if need be, always hold their hand. Of course, there is no guarantee that the child will ever follow this simple rule willingly. Almost always, it requires disobedience and/or a life-changing experience to either set the child straight or make the parent take drastic measures in the future. This is the perfect summary as to the event that occurred in a New York Macy’s Department Store when I was four years old.
The Christmas holiday season was very hectic. My mother wanted to finish her holiday shopping, but unfortunately, none of my babysitters were available and my father was at work, so Mom had no other course of action except to take me along with her. At the entrance to Macy’s, Mom told me loud and clear: “Do not wander away from me in the store. I want you to stay right next to me at all times.” She could’ve screamed it through a megaphone, however, my teeny tiny brain refused to heed her words of command because we weren’t even in the store for two seconds and I was already tearing off through the establishment like a rabid monkey.
For the next hour or so, my mom was constantly begging me to stop wandering around and stay with her, but all I did was disobey her time and time again. I would stand next to her for a few minutes just to satisfy her, but the moment her back was turned, I was off again just like that. I believe by the twentieth time I had gone off to some new section of the department store, she’d given up and figured, “Maybe if I let her explore every nook and cranny, she’ll get tired and come back…” Then again, this is a four year old she was dealing with, so “tired” was basically thrown out of the window.
By this time, I’d found my way into the Men’s Clothing section, but in actuality, I was searching for the toy
As a small child, parents have always taught their little bundle of joy never to wander around in the store, to always stick by them like super glue, and if need be, always hold their hand. Of course, there is no guarantee that the child will ever follow this simple rule willingly. Almost always, it requires disobedience and/or a life-changing experience to either set the child straight or make the parent take drastic measures in the future. This is the perfect summary as to the event that occurred in a New York Macy’s Department Store when I was four years old.
The Christmas holiday season was very hectic. My mother wanted to finish her holiday shopping, but unfortunately, none of my babysitters were available and my father was at work, so Mom had no other course of action except to take me along with her. At the entrance to Macy’s, Mom told me loud and clear: “Do not wander away from me in the store. I want you to stay right next to me at all times.” She could’ve screamed it through a megaphone, however, my teeny tiny brain refused to heed her words of command because we weren’t even in the store for two seconds and I was already tearing off through the establishment like a rabid monkey.
For the next hour or so, my mom was constantly begging me to stop wandering around and stay with her, but all I did was disobey her time and time again. I would stand next to her for a few minutes just to satisfy her, but the moment her back was turned, I was off again just like that. I believe by the twentieth time I had gone off to some new section of the department store, she’d given up and figured, “Maybe if I let her explore every nook and cranny, she’ll get tired and come back…” Then again, this is a four year old she was dealing with, so “tired” was basically thrown out of the window.
By this time, I’d found my way into the Men’s Clothing section, but in actuality, I was searching for the toy