Preview

Why Men Are from Mars and Women Are from Venus.

Better Essays
Open Document
Open Document
1295 Words
Grammar
Grammar
Plagiarism
Plagiarism
Writing
Writing
Score
Score
Why Men Are from Mars and Women Are from Venus.
Why men are from Mars and women are from Venus.

Are there any differences on how women and men talk? This is a question many people ponder on everyday. It is easy to assume that because English belongs to the person who uses it, men and women would likely to talk the same way but that may not be the case. Linguistics experts had proven that shown that men and women communicate in different ways. Speech style, word use, and body language are apparent between men and women. Women focus more on making connections, while men generally focus on public contexts where informative and persuasive talk is highly valued and appreciated.
In the essay “I 'll Explain it to you: Lecturing and Listening" by Deborah Tannen, she believes that even though men and women speak the same lingua franca, but their affirmation of support, conversational patterns and body language are very different. In the earlier years of development, Tannen observes that girls use speech to find confirmation and establish intimacy, whereas boys use speech to assert their independence and attain social status (283-5). In a study by psychologist H. M. Leet-Pellegrini who set to find out how men and women communicate with each other and who is more dominant in a conversation. (Tannen 284). When women are listening, they will show support by saying things like “Yeah” and “That’s right”, even though they are more knowledgeable than the men on that particular topic (Tannen 283). However, this may not be the case for men. Tannen states that when it is the other way around, men tend to say something like “So you’re the expert.” (283). It showed that when women has superior amount of knowledge than the men, “It will sparked resentment, not respect”, and because of that "Women are inclined to play down their expertise rather than display it." (Tannen 283). Women are scared to express their opinion because of what other people will think of them. Tannen feels that men are always trying to grab the leadership



Cited: Page. Tannen, Deborah. “I’ll Explain It To You : Lecturing and Listening”. Exploring Language, 11/e. Ed. Gary Goshgarian. New York : Longman, 2005. 281-293. Print. Holmes, Janet. “Woman Talks Too Much”. Exploring Language, 11/e. Ed. Gary Goshgarian. New York : Longman, 2005. 299-305. Print. Rafelman, Rachel. “The Party Line”. Exploring Language, 11/e. Ed. Gary Goshgarian. New York : Longman, 2005. 316-321. Print.

You May Also Find These Documents Helpful

  • Good Essays

    Tannen, D. (1991). You Just Don 't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation (1st ed.). New York: Ballantine Books.…

    • 973 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    Amy Tan’s story “Mother Tongue” starts by the affirmation that she is not a scholar of English or literature. She is just a writer and the person who understand the power of language. From Tan’s observations from her daily life, she realizes that there are different types of English that she uses. The first time Tan notices the difference is when she gives a speech on her book “The Joy Luck Club” using academic English, the one that she never uses to talk with her mother. The second time is when Tan talked using “fractured” English unconsciously with her mother when walking down the street. After that, Tan recalls her memories from her early age: the phone call for her mother to the stockbroker, the meeting with a doctor in the hospital for her mother’s CAT scan result to demonstrate her mother’s realization of “limited” English. Then Tan agrees with the idea that language spoken in…

    • 760 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Powerful Essays

    3) Flower, Linda. “Writing for an Audience.” Exploring Language. Ed. Gary Goshgarian. 13th ed. Pearson, 2011 91-93. Print.…

    • 1588 Words
    • 7 Pages
    Powerful Essays
  • Good Essays

    In the article, “But What Do You Mean?”, author Deborah Tannen discusses what she has observed to be differences in ways that women and men communicate. She concludes by stating that neither communication style in incorrect, however, to alleviate miscommunication women and men should use language that is understood by both parties. While I don’t disagree with Tannen’s observations I find some flaws with her solution. Women and men are not significantly different, as recent brain studies have shown, I believe that the differing socialization of women and men as children breeds the stylistic communication differences Tannen describes. So while limiting one’s speech to common language may work in a pinch, there is a long term solution that could…

    • 1333 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Powerful Essays

    The Agrument Culture

    • 1831 Words
    • 8 Pages

    A professor of linguistics at Georgetown University, Deborah Tannen is also a best-selling author of many books on discourse and gender, including Conversational Style: Analyzing Talk Among Friends (1984), You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation (1990), Talking from 9 to 5 (1994), and The Argument Culture: Moving from Debate to Dialogue (1998). Throughout her career, Tannen has focused on how men and women have different conversational habits and assumptions, whether they talk on the job or at home.…

    • 1831 Words
    • 8 Pages
    Powerful Essays
  • Good Essays

    Deborah Tannen

    • 775 Words
    • 4 Pages

    In Deborah Tannen’s essay “I’ll Explain It to You: Lecturing and Listening”, she asserts the belief that even though men and women speak the same structural language, their motivations for speech and conversational patterns are very different. In the earlier years of development, Tannen observes that girls use speech to find confirmation and establish intimacy, whereas boys use speech to assert their independence and attain social status. After transitioning to adulthood, women find themselves bored and constantly nodding as men lecture them. Tannen provides specific observations of gender communication that portrays women as passive reactors in a conversation and men as the dominant aggressors. For example, Tannen writes that men tend to lead the conversation while women tend to offer their opinions of agreement or disagreement. She also states that expertise does not guarantee a women center stage in a discussion as it would a man. In response to Tannen ideas, I find that there are no parallels to my experiences and her observations. Frequently I am the one to initiate and hold a conversation, as well as provide my opinion even when I am uncertain about its validity. I notice myself making the group, which includes men, laugh and therefore I establish myself in the conversation. In no way do Tannen’s observations of language according to gender reflect upon my speech tendencies.…

    • 775 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    Communicaton

    • 424 Words
    • 2 Pages

    One impression of not listening results from differences i the mechanics of conversation. Deborah tannen studies videotapes, made by psychologist Bruce Dorval, of young children and adults talking to their same sex best friends. Within all ages, the girld and women face each other in conversation with direct eye contact. Unlike the boys and the men who would not face one another and periodically glanced around the room.By facing away and little eye contact gives women the impession that the men are not listening.…

    • 424 Words
    • 2 Pages
    Satisfactory Essays
  • Good Essays

    Sex Differences

    • 814 Words
    • 3 Pages

    The way a language is used by a person to speak to one another is all that matters; they pick out their ways for a specific activity or purpose. For instance, Macaulay states that “Both men and woman will use the forms if language, registers, and styles appropriate to the activities in which they are engaged” (309). Notably, women at their natural state are straight forward to the point which they want to express; they talk in a simple manner and in some cases, they raise their voice in order to convince someone effectively. In contrast, men have a creative mind in their language usage. They always seek for new things to apply in their speech, and their manner goes along with toughness (solid voice) as in the example “Adult males on average have deeper voices than adult females because the vibrating part of the vocal cords is about a third longer in men” (Macaulay, 311). Depending on different activities, a person of either gender has to pick out an effective language usage which best suits the situation that they find themselves involving in. Otherwise, people will criticize the way you talk, whether it is professional or not.…

    • 814 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Best Essays

    "Speak- Laurie Halse Anderson." Department of English. Arizona State University. 2010. Web. 28 Nov. 2011. .…

    • 3346 Words
    • 14 Pages
    Best Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    To conclude with, I would say that the differences between men and women –in their communication styles doesn’t mean that one’s sex whether it be man or woman is better than the other; it simply means that both styles of communication are equally effective to that gender.…

    • 108 Words
    • 1 Page
    Satisfactory Essays
  • Good Essays

    There are some distinct differences between how men and women use and understand communication. There are differences in how we approach, laugh, or relate to a conversation based on the genders of each party that may arise in some challenges. Understanding of how each gender interacts with certain topics makes…

    • 612 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    The Line Final Draft

    • 1440 Words
    • 4 Pages

    Cited: Rafelman, Rachel. “The Party Line.” Exploring Language. Ed. Gary Goshgarian. 11th ed. New York: Longman, 2007. Print.…

    • 1440 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    Deborah Tannen’s “Who Does the Talking Here” first appeared in the July 15, 2007 edition of the Washington Post. Tannen is a professor of linguistics at Georgetown University and an author of many scholarly articles and books on subjects in her field. Tannen states that recent studies to determine who talks more, men or women, have not been helpful in determining that. She argues that these studies are focusing on the word count instead of how these words are being used and in which situation most of the talking is being done. Tannen goes on to state that the comfort with various social situations varies between both genders. She explains that men tend to use "report-talk" whereas women tend to use "rapport-talk." Most of the talking by men…

    • 705 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    To define these communication conundrums, Tannen discusses "rapport-talk" and "report-talk". She defines "rapport-talk" as "For most women, the language of conversation is primarily a language of rapport: a way of establishing connections and negotiating relationships" (Cooper and MacDonald 10). Rapport-talk has its strong points focused on showing similarities and matching experiences. Women choose private speaking as the best places for communication. They like small settings and small groups of people that they know well. Tannen uses "report-talk" to explain how men communicate. "Report-talk" is "For most men, talk is primarily a means to preserve independence and negotiate and maintain status in a hierarchical social order" (Cooperand MacDonald 10). Men choose to communicate in public settings, they like to hold center stage by talking as much as possible and to be recognized and acknowledged as having a place in the social order. But as Tannen states, "even the most private situations can be approached like public speaking, more like giving a report than establishing a rapport" (Cooper and MacDonald 10).…

    • 802 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    Amy Tan Mother's Speech

    • 172 Words
    • 1 Page

    In “Mother Tongue”, Amy Tan claims the different ways people speak and how it will vary around people and from person to person. Tan talks mainly about her mother’s speech and how some people may view it as “broken” or “partial English.” Tan writes about when she hears her mother’s speech she is able to understand it and does not notice that it is broken or maybe be hard to understand. Amy Tan explains how people treat her mother different with less respect than they would a person who can speak better English. Tan's purpose is to make her readers aware of her language that she shares with her mother and convince them that language does not have to be complex or perfectly structured to be understood. Language can be understood through words…

    • 172 Words
    • 1 Page
    Good Essays

Related Topics