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Two Is Company, Three Is More Fun: a Study of Polyamory

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Two Is Company, Three Is More Fun: a Study of Polyamory
A typical suburban house nestled on a cul-de-sac, a green lawn and a well maintained garden, obviously taken care of but not obsessively so. Three cars in the driveway, and two children playing in the sprinkler set up in the front yard. Sitting on the deck enjoying a glass of wine is the owner of the house and grandmother to one of the girls. Her daughter and her daughter’s boyfriend are arguing over the order of meat on the grill, his wife is scolding the soaking girls for running into the house without towels before she walks over to the grill to mediate the argument and help the two to kiss and make up. Confused? Trust me when I say that you wouldn’t be the first. No this is not the intro to some strange horror movie, nor is it the newest shock drama on television. This is “Real Life”, and actual people. They subscribe to a lifestyle called Responsible/Ethical Non-monogamy also called Polyamory. Polyamory is the philosophy and practice of maintaining more than one intimate relationship simultaneously, with the full knowledge and consent of all involved.

What is Polyamory?

Derived from both the Greek word for many and the Latin word for love, there is some contention to how the word came into being. One theory is that it was coined by Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart, a pagan priestess, in the late 1980s (McCullough & David S. Hall, 2003). However, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, who added the term in 2006, the first appearance of the word was with the formation of the alt.polyamory newsgroup in May 1992 (Matthesen).

Polyamorists say that their lifestyle’s foundation is built on the theory that love is infinite. An example of this, which can be understood by most, would be how a person feels when his or her second child is born. They do not love that child any less than the first, there always seems to be enough love in a parents’ heart for all the children they have. Taking this theory further Polyamorists believe that they do not need to



Bibliography: Leanna Wolfe PhD. (2008, October 12). On Kittens and the Very Invented Culture of Polyamory. Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality , http://www.ejhs.org/volume11/Wolfe.htm. Anais Nin Quotes. (2010). Retrieved April 1, 2010, from Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/7190?page=4 Bennet, J Dr. Joy Davidson PhD. (2002, April 16). WORKING WITH POLYAMOROUS CLIENTS IN THE CLINICAL SETTING. Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality , http://www.ejhs.org/volume5/polyoutline.html. Harper, D. (2001-2010). Romance. Retrieved from Online Etymology: http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=romance Herndon, P Lewis, C. (1960). The Four Loves. New York: Harcourt Brace. Loving More. (2005-2009 ). Polyamory Terms. Retrieved from Loving More: http://www.lovemore.com/terms.php Lynn, R Mandy Van Deven. (2009, March/April). Polyamory in practice: An open discussion with Tristan Taormino and Jenny Block. Briarpatch Magazine , pp. http://briarpatchmagazine.com/polyamory-in-practice/. Pasternak, B., Ember, C. & Ember, M. (1997). Sex, Gender and Kinship: A Cross-Cultural Perspective. Upper Saddle River, N.J.: Prentice Hall. Psychology Today. (1993, May 1). Myths of Infidelity. Retrieved from Psychology Today: http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/199305/myths-infidelity Richard Coon, PhD Roiphe, K. (2010). Liberated in Love: Can Open Marriage Work? . Harpers Bazaar , pp. http://www.harpersbazaar.com/magazine/feature-articles/open-marriages-0809.

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