Narcissistic Mothers
Narcissistic Mothers 1
“I wish you were never born”, my mother screamed across the living room. Mom was in one of her moods again, what was new. She has a way of making you feel like you couldn’t even understand. You didn’t know if you should run to her aid or go shut yourself in your room to get out of her hair. No matter what she made you feel it was always about her. I dealt with my mother’s selfish moods on a daily basis. I did not even come close to understanding this as a young child but always had an innate feeling that there was something seriously wrong with her. I would go back and fourth being pissed off to severely empathetic to her. I have always struggled with wanting a relationship with my mother; I love her and hate her all in the same breath. I can never recall one time in my life feeling like we were emotionally connected. I just want her to be sorry, and even more than that I want her to just recognize how bad it was. Ultimately more than anything I want to feel close to her. I don’t want to feel uncomfortable when she hugs me. Over the years I have blamed her, myself, her parents, even genetics. I am left feeling confused and unsatisfied. I am naturally a strong-minded person with a lot of self-confidence. With that said I do believe this lack of relationship has really held me back in life. I am confident that I will eventually feel a resolution in some form or another. It could be a solid relationship with her, or maybe an understanding of why it will never be. No matter what I discover to be the truth I do know that I love her very much and she does the same for me. That is probably the single most reason this is so frustrating.
Narcissistic Mothers 2
As a young child I was very blaming of my mother. Anger was by far the dominant feeling. I could not understand how a mother could be so hard on her child. I would think that a mom has a baby so that they can love and nurture them. In my case
“I wish you were never born”, my mother screamed across the living room. Mom was in one of her moods again, what was new. She has a way of making you feel like you couldn’t even understand. You didn’t know if you should run to her aid or go shut yourself in your room to get out of her hair. No matter what she made you feel it was always about her. I dealt with my mother’s selfish moods on a daily basis. I did not even come close to understanding this as a young child but always had an innate feeling that there was something seriously wrong with her. I would go back and fourth being pissed off to severely empathetic to her. I have always struggled with wanting a relationship with my mother; I love her and hate her all in the same breath. I can never recall one time in my life feeling like we were emotionally connected. I just want her to be sorry, and even more than that I want her to just recognize how bad it was. Ultimately more than anything I want to feel close to her. I don’t want to feel uncomfortable when she hugs me. Over the years I have blamed her, myself, her parents, even genetics. I am left feeling confused and unsatisfied. I am naturally a strong-minded person with a lot of self-confidence. With that said I do believe this lack of relationship has really held me back in life. I am confident that I will eventually feel a resolution in some form or another. It could be a solid relationship with her, or maybe an understanding of why it will never be. No matter what I discover to be the truth I do know that I love her very much and she does the same for me. That is probably the single most reason this is so frustrating.
Narcissistic Mothers 2
As a young child I was very blaming of my mother. Anger was by far the dominant feeling. I could not understand how a mother could be so hard on her child. I would think that a mom has a baby so that they can love and nurture them. In my case