Legalization of Cannibalism
Virginia Woolf once said, "One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well." This is one of the many arguments behind legalizing cannibalism. If the act of eating other human beings was legalized and regulated it will solve all the problems of modern society. Cannibalism has been around since the Neolithic times. It is not currently practiced, but I think a revival of this age-old practice would benefit everyone. Cannibalism can solve world hunger. It can improve our criminal justice system. Cannibalism will also put an end to over population and spice up some of the current cooking shows. The legalization of cannibalism is what our modern world needs to turn itself around. The common idea behind using cannibalism to end world hunger is that we can kill half the people in the world and feed them to the other half. I disagree with that. Humans can live without their pinkey fingers, appendixes, and tonsils. This amounts to more than four hundred grams of useable meat per person. If the entire world donated those body parts, we would have 2, 400, 000, 000, 000 grams of meat or 2, 400, 000 metric tons or 3, 779, 250 cows worth of meat. These figures do not include the number of people who die and who would be edible. This, combined with the other foods currently available would help feed all the hungry people of the world. By legalizing and encouraging organized cannibalism we can help hungry and malnourished people everywhere. If cannibalism is legalized the world will be much better behaved. I do not think that the majority of criminals would commit crimes if they knew that their appendages would end up in the supermarket if they were caught. This would also apply to schools. Detentions do not work, but I think that if you break a rule you will have to give a limb to be eaten. If you are late five times, it is a toe. If you skip an English class, the punishment is a pound of flesh. The Young Offenders Act should also