Book Review Why We Don't Listen
Summary
James C. Peterson, author of Why Don't We Listen Better? Communicating & Connecting in Relationships, through trial and error learned the value of communication balancing in which he found that the counselor must listen awhile, talk until the other person stops hearing and then listen until the person calms enough to hear again.(Peterson, 2007 Pg. 5) This concept is enlarged into a process in which Peterson calls the flat-brain syndrome. The purpose of the writing of this book according to Peterson was to assist couples in gaining the communication skills needed to improve their relationship. In this book Peterson says to make personal connection with people communication skills need to involve the stomach, which puts our feelings into words, the heart which makes clear that we are putting our own feelings into words and the head which puts our thoughts into words. (Peterson, 2007 Pg. 16) Peterson says that he uses the flat-brain syndrome to understand the problem of failed communication. Peterson explains “communication is the lubrication designed to keep our functions of stomach, heart, and head working separately and together” (Peterson 2007, Pg. 16).
The gifted Peterson also takes the concept of the flat brain syndrome a step further by relating to the reader what happens when our systems (stomach, heart and head) get out of whack. (Peterson 2007, Pg. 23) In this scenario Peterson uses these parts to show what happens to communication, for example stomach overloads, hearts might turn bricklike, brains can go flat, and hearing is altered. These things of course alter the way we hear and feel. These things then set us up to fall into the flat-brain syndrome. (Peterson 2007 35-48)
In part two Peterson explains the “talker-listener” process or what he refers to as TLC which exhibits his feelings about the whole counseling process. Part three explains the techniques Peterson uses in listening and the traps one can fall into in the process. The process
James C. Peterson, author of Why Don't We Listen Better? Communicating & Connecting in Relationships, through trial and error learned the value of communication balancing in which he found that the counselor must listen awhile, talk until the other person stops hearing and then listen until the person calms enough to hear again.(Peterson, 2007 Pg. 5) This concept is enlarged into a process in which Peterson calls the flat-brain syndrome. The purpose of the writing of this book according to Peterson was to assist couples in gaining the communication skills needed to improve their relationship. In this book Peterson says to make personal connection with people communication skills need to involve the stomach, which puts our feelings into words, the heart which makes clear that we are putting our own feelings into words and the head which puts our thoughts into words. (Peterson, 2007 Pg. 16) Peterson says that he uses the flat-brain syndrome to understand the problem of failed communication. Peterson explains “communication is the lubrication designed to keep our functions of stomach, heart, and head working separately and together” (Peterson 2007, Pg. 16).
The gifted Peterson also takes the concept of the flat brain syndrome a step further by relating to the reader what happens when our systems (stomach, heart and head) get out of whack. (Peterson 2007, Pg. 23) In this scenario Peterson uses these parts to show what happens to communication, for example stomach overloads, hearts might turn bricklike, brains can go flat, and hearing is altered. These things of course alter the way we hear and feel. These things then set us up to fall into the flat-brain syndrome. (Peterson 2007 35-48)
In part two Peterson explains the “talker-listener” process or what he refers to as TLC which exhibits his feelings about the whole counseling process. Part three explains the techniques Peterson uses in listening and the traps one can fall into in the process. The process