assignment2
Haoying Wang
Unnecessary nominalization obscures the real verb. Always fix passive voice constructions. See p. 236 & revise these to focus on the real verb:
1. Evaluation of the gumming tendency of the four tire types will be accomplished by comparing the amount of rubber that can be scraped from the tires.
We will evaluate the gumming tendency of the four tire types by comparing the amount of rubber that can be scraped from the tires.
2. Reduction of the size of the tear-gas generator has already been completed.
We reduced the size of the tear-gas generator.
3. Pollution constitutes a threat to the Wilson Wildlife Preserve.
Pollution threatens the Wilson Wildlife Preserve.
Refer to pp. 236-37 & revise the following sentences to fix problems in parallelism:
4. The next two sections of the manual discuss how to analyze the data, the conclusions that can be drawn from your analysis, and how to decide what further steps are needed before establishing a journal list.
The next two sections of the manual discuss how to analyze the data, how to draw conclusions from your analysis, and how to decide what further steps are needed before establishing a journal list.
5. Mary likes skateboarding, rollerskating, and to ride a bicycle.
Mary likes skateboarding, roller-skating and riding bicycles.
6. Sections 1 & 2 will introduce the entire system, while Sections 3 & 4 describe the automatic application and step-by-step instructions.
Sections 1 & 2 introduce the entire system, while Section 3 & 4 describe the automatic application and describe step-by-step instructions.
Refer to pp. 241-43 & rewrite these to change passive constructions:
7. Most of the information you need will be gathered as you document the history of the journals.
You will find most of the information you need as you document the history of the journals.
8. When choosing multiple programs to record, be sure that the proper tape speed has been chosen.
When choosing
Unnecessary nominalization obscures the real verb. Always fix passive voice constructions. See p. 236 & revise these to focus on the real verb:
1. Evaluation of the gumming tendency of the four tire types will be accomplished by comparing the amount of rubber that can be scraped from the tires.
We will evaluate the gumming tendency of the four tire types by comparing the amount of rubber that can be scraped from the tires.
2. Reduction of the size of the tear-gas generator has already been completed.
We reduced the size of the tear-gas generator.
3. Pollution constitutes a threat to the Wilson Wildlife Preserve.
Pollution threatens the Wilson Wildlife Preserve.
Refer to pp. 236-37 & revise the following sentences to fix problems in parallelism:
4. The next two sections of the manual discuss how to analyze the data, the conclusions that can be drawn from your analysis, and how to decide what further steps are needed before establishing a journal list.
The next two sections of the manual discuss how to analyze the data, how to draw conclusions from your analysis, and how to decide what further steps are needed before establishing a journal list.
5. Mary likes skateboarding, rollerskating, and to ride a bicycle.
Mary likes skateboarding, roller-skating and riding bicycles.
6. Sections 1 & 2 will introduce the entire system, while Sections 3 & 4 describe the automatic application and step-by-step instructions.
Sections 1 & 2 introduce the entire system, while Section 3 & 4 describe the automatic application and describe step-by-step instructions.
Refer to pp. 241-43 & rewrite these to change passive constructions:
7. Most of the information you need will be gathered as you document the history of the journals.
You will find most of the information you need as you document the history of the journals.
8. When choosing multiple programs to record, be sure that the proper tape speed has been chosen.
When choosing